Like the giant eye in this sunflower, I have taken the past week or so to take time and watch and listen.
Sometimes I feel as though I take everything in, but when I do, I really don’t THINK about it.
Things happen. My neighbor’s husband died, and I knew him for 10 years. He passed at 98. Ninety eight. Pretty good shelf life, I would say. I made it a point to really listen to his wife, who I consider a good friend, and hear her grief. I tried to comfort her as best as I can and check in on her daily. Another friend fell and broke her ankle and had to have surgery. Again, when I go to see her, I make it a point to really dial in and take in what exactly she is telling me. I am due to go to the dietician today. I know when I go there I will be right with her, trying to work on a healthier life style so my shelf life will be decent. That means a lot to me, as this Saturday it’ll be twenty one years since my Dad passed away. He wanted desperately to see seventy seven. Why? Because his Dad lived to seventy six. Now, I am not setting parameters on my shelf life, but it’s that time of year when Dad’s passing has me so aware of time.
A good friend of mine commented on a Facebook post I made, lamenting the short season for hydrangeas in the heat of summer. He quoted that old song about for everything, turn, turn, turn, there is a season…..and it is so true.
I was on the Cape May Ferry this past weekend and in the elevator, a young blond headed girl was there with her sister and her mom. I walked into the elevator and that little face looked up at me, pointed a finger and announced,” I know you; you’re my teacher.” Needless to say the exchange made me feel good, or as Jim would say, I wore a major idiotic grin on my face. Maybe it’s the anticipation of a new school year that added to my recognition of the passage of time. I know poor Kasia will get the short straw when I go back, but thanks to paying better attention to my weight, I will be able to spend more time and walks with her when I get home. I’d like to think that I honor Zush’s memory by giving Kasia all the love she needs and then some.
Most importantly, it’ll be our seventeenth wedding anniversary coming up. It’s to the point where I can’t really remember my life before Jim entered it.
It’s hard, since my Mom is gone seven years. I get to go and see my Mother-in-law for Mothers’ day, so I still, in a sense, get to celebrate the day. Unfortunately, part of me still tugs sadly, since I’d want to go see Mom.
Sometimes I feel bad, as I am a dog Mom, and not a human Mom. I am a benevolent aunt to my niece and nephews, but it really doesn’t matter. A Mom is a Mom. I still honor my buddies who are Moms in their own right, and most of them are also grandmothers too. They are all fabulous with their children and grandchildren. I am fortunate that I get to work with the school children, as I imagine it is the closest to being a hands-on Mom that I could get.
Happy Mothers’ day to all those who are celebrating the day. You have touched the world in the best of all possible ways. I salute you!
Whenever I required a medical procedure, and was required to go into the hospital, I was blessed to have a great support system. When it comes down to brass tacks, though, I was the patient. No one else. Procedures are scary. When you have family you are worrying about, it adds to the weight on you, the patient.
I am writing this post for one of my BFF’s. They know who they are.
Cancer is scary. It’s good to vent your emotion at this lousy disease. You have to be holding good karma, and hoping for the best. The crappy thing is having to go through it. I wish I were there in person to get you through it, but please know a long distance rope of prayers and best wishes are out there with you!
Thanks to a friend of mine on Facebook, I have been trying to catch up with a religious friend of mine, who saw me through some bad times with my first cancer.
With thanks to Maryanne, a buddy of mine, she forwarded me this photo of my pal Brother Jim. I understand he is in Pittsburgh these days and not up to par. We met on the morning of my cancer surgery and became fast friends.
So now it’s time to become Columbo and say a prayer that I can reestablish our friendship.
We were spoiled down here at Undisclosed Location with some nice weather for a while last week. In saying that, I mean, no big coats, gloves, scarves, and I was quite happy taking the girls out with a baseball hat.
I had leggings under sweatpants, a long sleeve tee under a polar fleece jacket, a vest under a coat, and you know what? The wind really was nasty. My neighbor’s theory that the weather changed too quick probably puts some teeth to the fact that I seem to have picked up a gastro bug. Good mom that I am, I went out twice and got the girls out and together we walked almost a mile and one half. Damn, it was cold.
The good part about the cold was the solitude down here and it soothes the soul.I managed to work prayers for good friends of ours going through a health crisis. By the time I was just about home, we were almost done.
They take care of me mentally as much as I take care of them physically and emotionally. It’s a win-win for all three of us.
It has really been a really stressing 48 hours, and yes,I know you who deal with this every day and with physical infirmities to boot are reading this and going “So?…”
Sometimes life really can push all your emotional buttons.I was so low last night and the commercial for the movie “A Dog’s Purpose”came on. Zush was laying in front of the television and I just cried for 30 minutes straight.The fact that it’s a time of year for most folks to be happy and jolly and I struggle daily to keep my stuff together doesn’t help much.The memories, good, bad, or indifferent, trigger another round of emotional cartwheels.
I have no biological sisters, but want to thanks my “sisters” who are there for me, and, unfortunately,let me cry on their shoulder today.It’s nice to have friends.In that respect, I am blessed.
That’s my post for today so hopefully, by writing this, I will be able to put this issue to bed and work on finding some holiday spirit.
We have another Christmas party to attend tonight.
I am convinced it’s a communist plot to get me out of my Danskin hoodie and make me actually brush my hair and put on some lipstick. After all, I am retired, but, as I constantly say, I have to be in this neighborhood for a long time, so you have to socialize with friends and neighbors.
This social schedule makes me double-time my Fit Bit stepping, and add the fact that it gets darker a little quicker makes it an issue for me. I try to get Zosia’s medicine in her and then we try to go and a decent walk in.Not only does it get my steps in but it gets both girls some exercise and empty tanks, as a rule.
Please be careful, dear reader,if you are out and about, as you realize that alcohol, in some form, is usually at a holiday party.After all, it would be nice to be able to see many more holiday parties for years to come.
Is there a magical time when you become an adult? Moving out of your parent's house? Paying your first bill? Getting married? Having kids? Turning 30? We are still figuring it out and writing about our journey along the way!