For the past three hundred and sixty-two days, I have been making strides with Kasia, who Jim and I refer to as the queen. She knows she has the rule of the house.
Yet my heart sinks daily as the memory of my Zushie is never far out of my mind. Three hundred and sixty-two sunrises and sunsets that I haven’t had her here with me. Fireworks throughout the year that I haven’t had to worry about calming her down.
I have some comfort that she is with my Mom, but it is still so hard.
I don’t even take Kasia down to the bay, as she doesn’t love it quite the way Zush did. I find it quite ironic that we moved down here because she could go and swim her hearts’ content in the bay, and now she is gone.
So please forgive me if I am not quite myself the next few days.
My heart hurts.