Ten

We have finished our first nine months of living full time here, away from the big city.

I would lie if I said I don’t miss the big city, because there are occasions that I do miss certain aspects of my prior life.We used to love close to Fairmount Park, and I miss having the ability to take the girls back there on occasion. When we lived on Rochelle, we were back there all the time.Now that it is October, I know the colors in the park will be spectacular, and although there are trees here, well, it’s not the same as where we first lived.

It is a dreary day here, as Hurricane/Tropical Storm Jauquin is working its’ way up the coast.It matches my mood here, as I am having Zush go for her second blood work today at the vet and worry is an understatement. I am just hoping to keep my girl going as long as I possibly can. There is something about being down here in stormy weather that just really brings out.After seeing, and reading, “The Perfect Storm”, weather is magnified when walking down by the bay. I would never have this atmosphere back in the city.

The first bunch of months here are in the books. I am hoping that we get through the next bunch well, and we stay happy and relatively healthy. I can’t pray and ask for more.

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Censoring Myself

For many years now, I have been writing posts to this blog.

Usually I write about something that has come across my mind, life, whatever, during the day.

On occasion,I have had things that I would have written about, but I pulled back at the last moment,because I just don’t feel like fighting with people or explaining myself. I feel that my writing pretty much speaks my mind.

Right now, I am asking for prayers and good thoughts. I am going through some rough emotional waters right now and need to get through it.

Thanks.

And here comes August…

Bad enough that my “weekend” is over, but here comes August.

If you have read this blog for any period of time, you could recall that August is quite the bittersweet month for me. I lost my Dad in 1998,and I got married in 2002.When I was a kid, my Dad always took us to the shore during the last week of August.

The best part of August, though, is the promise of fall. You can muck through the hazy, hot and humids of August and know that sometime soon the fronts will be coming and cool things off.I know my Mom always would warn me against wishing my life away, but this is one summer that I can hardly wait until the first 70 degree day comes.

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Summer’s gone…almost

I can’t believe July is almost over.

I was hoping to have had some time for rest and relaxation. Instead,I am working. I would have liked to spent time working in my garden. It unfortunately looks like the amount of time I have spent on it.I have enjoyed taking the girls down to the bay before, but now, I have to savor having them at the beach once a week.

We had to take Zush to the vet tonight because she has had a GI bug of sorts.Hopefully, the medicine and temporary diet change we are going to have to do will have her feeling better. It is a bittersweet reminder about how short life is, and it needs to be enjoyed.

I am determined that this last month of August will have me actually taking more time to enjoy things.They say you know what you have missed after it has passed you by.

Here’s to stopping the train, getting off, and savoring what’s left of life.

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Life’s Short

The joke is where we have moved to, well, let’s just say I’m one of the youngest people here, full-time wise.

A good percentage of the residents come down for the summer, or part of it. A neighbor of our that we would have lived immediately next to, if we bought the first house, lives in Collegeville. He has been coming down here for ten years or so. He is married and has two adopted and one biological tumor.His age is somewhere between mine(55) and Jim’s(60).

He came down here over the weekend with one of our neighbors and his family.

He wants to die here at his house here.

He has a mid-brain tumor.

For those of you who know me personally, or have been reading the blog for a while, you’ll recall I lost my niece, Alexandra, to a mid-brain tumor.She died at 18.

What flashbacks this has brought back to me, my neighbor’s illness.A brain tumor is definitely NOT how you want to go out. It is a fight, a hard fight.

My neighbor and I were walking past his house and one of the neighbors came out and said he isn’t expected to last the night: hospice is there with them.

We mourn the man, but rejoice that his suffering will be done. I am happy he actually hung in through the car ride to get down here, but I know this was his final wish.

Kiss or hug someone you know after you read this. Do it for me.

Life is too damn short.

Thanksgiving week

It’s that time of year again for me.

I think it’s kind of common that when you get to a point in a life, you have some balance, and then the balance tips the other way.

I miss and honor those who are no longer with me at Thanksgiving.

It’s not really a fair statement, as I miss them every day. I include them in my prayers daily.Perhaps if things were different, the melancholia that settles over me like a fog could be shaken off.But it doesn’t. I strive to savor those with me, have loving thoughts for those separated from me by distance, and prayers for those who are having a heavenly holiday.

There was a time when grandparents were still around, and aunts and uncles and parents and cousins and, in short, a full table.

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Pink month,er, green?red?yellow?

I have had numerous cancers in my 54 years.

Cervical,to start, then breast, then thyroid, and sprinkle in some skin cancer along the way.

I was at the dermatologist today having a squamous cell carcinoma taken off my face located in front of my right ear.I had four biopsies last month, and cock-eyed optimist, me,well, I had made this appointment today with hope of going in only to get biopsy stitches out.Hah! I,in the back of my head, knew better.

The cancer that they took today was one that I found.Oh yes;I am an old pro at this by now. It was raised and starting to get itchy.I asked them to take it when I went for my annual check-up.I was very fortunate, for now.It was in the state of being ” in situ”.This meant it was so early that they couldn’t even put a stage on it yet.I can’t conclude on it yet, as I have to wait for the results of what was taken today. The physician hopefully got clean edges, which would show the cancer has not spread.If the edges turn out to be not”clean”, well, I’ll be back in for treatment.

My skin is light and freckled and my eyes are hazel.I know I am prone to this, and sometimes sunscreen isn’t a safe enough guard.The thing is I CHECK.No matter what, I CHECK!

Gentle reader; I appreciate all of you and would like you to keep on reading.Please be here to do so.Check yourselves for cancer.It may not be your favorite thing to do but it saves lives.I have lost a niece to cancer and other sporadic family members have had it.Trust me-we don’t want any more members in our club.

Your life is priceless!

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Something for nothing

It never ceases to surprise me.

Give people an inch, they want a mile and a half. If the shoe was on the other foot, they would be charter members of the
“what have you done for me lately?” club.

In the meantime, I am here treading water getting a cramp from it and these folks would be the last people to throw
someone else a line.

In the meanwhile, the noise factor of the drone bees goes buzzing along.

**Sigh**

Pardon me while I jump down off the soap box and resume treading.

Melancholia

I have given it a shot.

The Encore movie channel is running the Thorn Birds miniseries over the following three nights, in addition to tonight.

I have read the book that it was adapted from, my good pal Duch named her oldest daughter after Meghann, the heroine. I have only seen the miniseries a ton….tonight, I couldn’t do it.

Life is real- happy, sad, trying times…whatever. I just couldn’t handle the underlying sadness tonite.

What have I opted for?…..

ESPN and the Houston-New England football game. With any luck, I’ll be sleeping soon… Lol

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