Party

I am rude.

I am at a family gathering on the phone, doing, of all things, a blog post.I am not the only one.

  
It’s rough when you aren’t a parent, or have made all the conversation possible, and you’re supposed to, uh, twiddle your thumbs?

I guess folks won’t invite me back if they think I’m rude. My guess is they are too busy talking to notice.

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Holiday away

It’s hard this year.

I pulled out my Mom’s ceramic Easter egg and a small crocheted easter egg she had. I couldn’t handle too much more out, because it’s the first Easter at the new home.We won’t be here for dinner, per se, because we’ll be with Jim’s Mom and family.

When Mom was around,we had Easter, Christmas and Thanksgiving every year at our home, and did what a lot of couples do: go to the other spouse’s family so everyone gets even time and you try not to slight anyone.

Mom is gone three years.

I haven’t had a Polish Easter in 3 years and for some reason, I am a little sad about it. I miss the traditions, although having the Polish parish in Manayunk get shut down by the Archdiocese doesn’t help either.I miss my brother and his family, I miss my Aunt and cousin: I am missing a lot.

My memory is still ok though, so I will have to share Easter with them in my prayers and in my mind and heart.

I am thankful that God still will let me do that.

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Melancholy Overload

A buddy of mine had posted a picture on Facebook tonight and it showed a plate of pizzelle cookies and some wine.Gee, I thought, what a good idea, until I remembered that my pizzelle maker is down at Undisclosed.

**sigh**

I think of other things that I could be doing up here, or, over the weekend, reverse it to down there, and whatever I am looking for always seems to be in the opposite place.The girls and I have been doing our walks, and I look around at their favorite routes and wonder to myself if they’ll miss it.

**sigh**

I stop and think about the history of this house that I am in right now, and it is the last place that my entire family was together seventeen years ago. Yes, I know that you take the memories with you but,……

**sigh**

We are going through the holiday season right now and I am trying hard to keep in the spirit. It really isn’t easy, and as my buddies would say, when you are down there full time, things will be good and different and you will feel better.

I like to think that I am ready to move forward into a new chapter of life. I just wish I didn’t feel the need to think I am going to need an ativan chaser for it.

Thanksgiving week

It’s that time of year again for me.

I think it’s kind of common that when you get to a point in a life, you have some balance, and then the balance tips the other way.

I miss and honor those who are no longer with me at Thanksgiving.

It’s not really a fair statement, as I miss them every day. I include them in my prayers daily.Perhaps if things were different, the melancholia that settles over me like a fog could be shaken off.But it doesn’t. I strive to savor those with me, have loving thoughts for those separated from me by distance, and prayers for those who are having a heavenly holiday.

There was a time when grandparents were still around, and aunts and uncles and parents and cousins and, in short, a full table.

If only……**sigh**20121112-160316.jpg

Needing a nap

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It’s hell being a social butterfly.

That is, when you are used to doing your own thing, on your own time or your employer’s time, and, quite frankly, life is routine.

For two weekends we had Jim’s surprise party, Mother’s day, time with my mother-in-law at the casino,a breast cancer walk, Gregory’s college graduation from Temple and Matt and Kat’s wedding to wrap it up with. Oh yeah, top that off with a chaser of food shopping and three loads of laundry yesterday.

Friday we are back to Undisclosed. We wonder if it misses us, because we sure missed it.It’ll be nice, as great as all these life events are, to get back to schedule.

Gotta be a holiday…

because I am up,congested to the top of my head, and Jim is sleeping.

Is there anything else worse than having your breathing impaired?Nothing in all my years with crappy sinuses have made me so physically uncomfortable. I don’t even want to think of how asthma and other sufferers of serious breathing diseases handle this on a daily basis, and with the thought of them, I know that I really can’t complain about being stopped up. Perhaps it is the 4:10am aspect of it-I am one who loves my sleep and know by being up now, it’s going to be a really long day.

In the old days, I’d be with all my family, parents, siblings, aunts, uncles and cousins as we would join together to celebrate the Polish Christmas eve custom of Wigilia, the Christmas Eve supper.Most of the family who were there now celebrate it in heaven:there are not too many of us left.The younger generation who have since come of age are spread throughout the country.So in my heart tonight I know I will go back and fondly remember how good it was back then and say a little prayer for those of my family partying in heaven.

Here’s hoping your Christmas eve fills your heart with happy memories and you have room to create even more!

Merry Christmas!

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The other Mrs. C.

My mother-in-law turned 95 yesterday.

Ninety-five.

I am jealous, although I am so happy for her, but it just makes me miss my Mom all that more.
She wouldn’t have liked to go out like my mother-in-law does, but just to see that smile and
and hear that voice would be so nice.

Sto lat, Mom C., and many more.God bless you and keep you safe.

Mom..I miss you every day.

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