Always good to have no support.
Go to “A” for assistance? Uh, the system is down.
Try “B” for back-up? Ditto.
Oh yeah, don’t forget to email folks who have brought you this message…..
Uh, ok…in my spare time, since I am busy dodging verbal missiles thrown at me through phones and in person.
Didn’t anyone ever hear the old chestnut about preventing things from occurring?